Absolutely not! My daughters were not allowed to go to boy's homes unless I met the parents a few times.
They [the boys] came to my house and they were not allowed in bedrooms.
They were taught to value their body, they were taught that [some] boys will tell then anything to have sex with you.If you're a parent, would you allow your teenage son or daughter to sleep around?
I am the parent of 5 adult children and 2 teens, and I realized a long time ago that the best way to handle this is by being open and informative with your children. I tried to instill a good ethical code in them and avoid false morality. You cannot stop teens from experimenting but you can teach the how to respect themselves and respect their partners. A person with good self-respect does not ';sleep around';. A person with self-respect and respect for others, takes responsibilty to protect themselves and others from unplanned pregnancy and STDs. So shortly after puberty we had a runnong conversation about sexual responsibilty, sexuality, ways of protection, and pleasure. I always advised them to wait as long as possible before engaging in intercourse because the older you are, the more you understand it and the more you will enjoy it.
You don't ignore the fact that your teens very well might have sex, in fact probably will have sex. But you can give them the tools they need to handle it with grace and responsibility. None of my adult children were promiscuous, but they had sexual relationships starting around 17 years old. They are aware and responsible. They use birth control and condoms. They are comfortable with their sexuality. To me, this is much more important than false morality.
No.
Edit: I know of a mother who allowed her daughter to have sex in her home and provided her with condoms and birth control. Her reasoning was, she'll do it anyways and at least I know she's in a safe environment using protection.
One child and three abortions later, her daughter has genital warts and still hasn't told her current partner (with whom she doesn't use protection) about her health issues. Needless to say, this method of parenting doesn't necessarily work.
Well I talked to mine as he grew, and had the long talk when he started having girlfriends. I was glad enough that my son came to me and asked me to buy him condoms when he was 17. I am a rarity, I am a parent that knows when her kid lost his virginity. And that he did it in an adult manner, of sorts. Because we gave him that kind of confidence and he had me and his dad to talk to, he did not sleep around. He has been open with us and we know just how many GF he has had and slept with. They are going too, they should be warned just like any other activity of the dangers, and pleasures coming of age can bring.
17-year-old here... How would a parent prevent their child from having sex? Unless you follow your kid around and let them have NO life of their own whatsoever, they are going to have the opportunity to have sex if that is what they want.
Good news, it's probably not what they want, at least not outside of a long-term relationship (so no 'sleeping around'), so don't worry about it. But it's really not something at all possible to prevent without stifling your kid's social development.
Better to sit your kid down and have a talk about your beliefs. Talk about waiting for love, or waiting for marriage if that's what you believe in. Make sure you talk about birth control, but also talk about relationships and love, not just the sex. We'll listen, and take into account what you have to say. We may not end up following your advice, but it will guide us. I'm sorry if that's not the most comforting response, but that's how it is.
I've taught my kids that sex is something you do in the context of a caring relationship. I've also educated them about STDs, contraceptive use and warned them that even when you take all precautions, accidents happen.
I can't say I would forbid them from sleeping around, but I don't see my children going that direction. My kids are making smart choices. My 16 year old is waiting. My older son has had 2 girlfriends, and each relationship has lasted over a year.
We as parents teach to correct, sometimes correcting someone hurts, but the hurt we use to correct can save someone from suffering and or death later on.
Your teen needs to know that no matter what, you are there to defend what is right, not what is comfortable. Be the parent, sometimes that means getting your hands dirty.
Your child will not have (truth) to blame you for later on in life if you hold on to what is right. Truth will never fail you, if you know something to be true, act on it and you will not be in regret, but fail truth and you are subject to everything else.
I would raise my children to understand that there is more to sex than just a good time, that it is more of an adult decision than they as teens are capable of making. But, as teens will do what they want sometimes, even against their parents' teachings, I would also make sure they have a comprehensive sex education. I would teach them the facts about birth control and STIs and what's important for them to know to make an informed decision. I would teach my children that they can talk to me about anything, even sex. Should I catch them having sex or somehow discover they are having sex, I would play hardball and drag them to Planned Parenthood and to the hospital and anywhere else I could think of so they can see first hand what it means to deal with unwanted pregnancies and STIs. I would even get permission from their girlfriends or boyfriends to bring them along for the same reason. I would make them suffer through the embarrassment of having to face people about issues surrounding sex. It would not be intended as punishment, but as a tough love learning tool. I want my children to be responsible.
Sorry to say but I think the question needs to be rephrased. We as parents do not allow our teenagers to do anything like this. We cannot always control what our teenagers and children do the only thing we can do is try to guide them the best we can and encompass them with the knowledge between what is right, wrong, decent, and respectful to ourselves and others. We cannot make all their choices for them but we as parents hope that they make the right choice. You cannot watch your children 24/7, this is just an impossible task. But there are some people who should not be parents and this is a whole other issue.
I would raise them to understand that sex is for adults. However, pretending that it will never happen and not making them understand that condoms will save their lives is insane.
Sorry, I don't want my child pregnant or contracting some deadly disease merely because of sanctimonious denial of reality.
Most parents don't ';allow'; their teenagers to sleep around, but since you can't be with your teenager 24/7, it's stupid to believe it won't happen.
I am a parent and of course I would not allow that. My kids are not going be allowed to date either. They need to concentrate on school and being a kid. When teenagers start dating most of them get depressed over someone else and then loose focus on school and family. Yes, most here will think I am crazy and will have a rebilous kids. But, it is MY JOB to do what is best for them. I don't parent on how the world does. Also my oldest daughter's friend is raised they same way and they will have each other to lean on through the dating thing.
I'm not a parent yet, but ';allow'; doesn't seem like the right word. It's their choice, you don't really allow or not allow it...but I obviously wouldn't allow them to bring partners home for sex, no.
I would educate my child on the risks/consequences/etc of sex. Having them fully informed would be the best I could do. The rest would be up to them. Hopefully with the right information and good self-esteem they would make good choices.
Nope. I don't understand parents who say ';well they're gonna do it anyways, may as well make them safe!'; What a cop-out. They don't do that when their kids are little and want to climb the counter to get the cookies...they don't do that with things like drinking and drug use (can you imagine? mom buying quality crack to make sure her kid gets the pure stuff? lol). Why do they do it with sex?
That said....it isn't a matter of allowing them or not. I wouldn't put it to my kids that way at all. Hubs and I want to take a different track with this one, put it to them as a matter of their integrity, their safety, their future. Not as ';you aren't allowed to do this!'; That won't work. They need to be armed with information about why it's better to abstain, and even now while they're young we need to start teaching them responsibility and self-control and give them a good strong sense of right and wrong. My oldest is 5 now, so we've got years to go before we have to really tackle the issue of sex. But I think it's a process that we are starting right now. We do our best to keep our home environment ';squeaky clean'; as it were and that will continue on into their teen years. And once they do start dating, there will be none of this ';oh we're going to my bedroom to study'; nonsense, or snuggling on the couch together, or spending all their time alone. Minimize temptation and make it hard for them to fall, and they're less likely to do so.
It can be done. It just takes the involvement of the whole family. : )
helllll no....what...unless your an idiot..and have no parenting skills....you need to be authoritative when it comes to your children...thats why you are first a parent and then a friend. if your scared you might push your child away...then advise them.... make them aware of consequences.. and how risky that type of behaviour is... let them know that if they want to behave like adults ..then they need to be responsible and protect themselves from pregnancy and diseases... and let them know that their whole family loves and cares about them and that they will be hurting so many people if something bad had to happen. tell them that you are not stopping them but that you're concerned and will support whatever decision.... but that they should think about it maturely and like a young reasonable adult. xoxo
I am on my second generation of raising children. I didn't condone it then and I don't now. When I was younger we did things we were not suppose to but it was not without huge risks and consequences. Not all teenagers are going to ';do it';. Alot of these types of behaviors come from low self esteem. You have to love and feel good about yourself so that no one can just say or pressure you into doing something you don't want to do.
Hell no. I don't sleep around because I know how stupid and dangerous it is. I don't want to get pregnant or get some disease, and I don't want my kids to be sleeping around either. Parents that have the whole my-kids-are-going-to-sleep-around-anyway鈥?attitudes, are just horrible people.
No, I wouldn't allow it, however I would be honest about it and if I really thought they were going to do it any way I would drill the concept of safe sex into their heads. I'd rather have a promiscuous child that practiced safe sex than a teen parent.
Edit: Or maybe I should follow the christian route and stick my fingers in my ears going ';la la la la la!!!'; That's bound to work, ask Bristol Palin!
I would tell them it is best to wait until marriage. I would not condemn it though.
If I caught him or her in my house I would punish them.
If they are ready for it, they are. Trying to keep them from will only worsen your relationship with them and give them psychological complexes. All they need to do is to bag it up every time.
I would be concerned about them having sex while under the age of consent, but once they were over it I would not regard their sex life as my business, and I could hardly prevent them sleeping with anyone they wanted to. However, I would urge them to use reliable contraception.
It's a lesser known fact that if you don't have control over your kids by the time they reach grade school, you're f*cked forever--let 'em go.
';Allow'; No, I wouldn't allow them sleep around.
I would hope I've raised them to be more responsible than that.
no you shouldnt even though they might do it any way theres always away to talk your child into be obedent they will listen if your a good paret if you have a good influence on your chilld theyll listen
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